So, I finish the Six O'Clock News, get a big coffee and go outside , and U2 are playing live in the fucking car park. What's that all about?
I get bombarded with 'Desi-er-re-er-re'. People screaming and shouting. I only went out for a cigarette. I feel my human rights have been infringed.
If I'd known earlier I would've brought my sniper rifle. There are a couple of good balconies high up and I could have been away, no problem.
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And I would've happily helped you take 'em out with some serious crossfire, thus creating a 'Lone Gunman' Mythos/Conspiracy Theory that people would have still been unravelling in 40 years time. Big up Bob The Nailer! I would particularly liked to have parted Bono's 'alleged' hairpiece just to see how they spun that in the press. The downside, of course, is that we would've made martyrs out of the bastards. Best to just let them go fat and bald; let Nature exact its own cruel revenge...
Yeah - Bono always wears a hat now. That's always a sign. I say try him for bringing back stadium rock then shoot the fucker.
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