Saturday, July 18, 2009

Top 10 Movies Mrs Zero Won't Watch With Me.

Well, clearly no fucker's going to have a guess at #03, so I'm claiming a win and nobody wins the fabulous holiday.
#01 Kelly's Heroes (1970) .
#02 - Ice Station Zebra (1968).
#03 - The Man Who Would Be King (1975).
#04 - Red Dawn (1984).
#05 - The Wild Bunch (1969).
#06 - The Last Boy Scout (1992).
#07 - Mad Max 2 / The Road Warrior (1982).
#08 - The Wild Geese (1978).
#09 - Von Ryan's Express (1965).
#10 - Extreme Predjudice (1987).

There you go, 10 classic films that Mrs Z physically withers at the mere mention of. I guess that's marraige for means never having to say "Shall we watch 'Where Eagles Dare'".
Tell me all ten & win an all expenses paid holiday to Combe Martin...if it's still there.

Friday, July 17, 2009

G.I. Joe : The Rise Of Cobra

Seriously, how is this not going to be a great film? How is that possible? And yet somehow I can't see Mrs Zero building up much enthusiasm, even on a two-for-the-price-of-one ticket, and this may lead to me not seeing it.
This is all leading to a 'Top 10' which I shall hopefully post tomorrow. In the meantime, check out Bugwar for an In Depth Analysis of this film.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Inspired by Kid Shirt's recent attempt to Twitter on his blog, and basically lacking any ideas of my own, here's my attempt at exactly the same thing, only with pictures, because I get bored with all the words.
Is anyone else sick of vampires being 're-imagined'?
Gratuitous picture of Rachel Nichols in 'GI Joe'.
Now that Farrah's passed on, who is the greatest living American actress? Heather Locklear? Adrienne Barbeau? I'm pretty sure it's one of those two.
Have The Arctic Monkeys written a good song yet?
'The Expendables' is going to be the best film ever made. There is no doubt about this.

Gratuitous picture of Sienna Miller in 'GI Joe'.
Iranians shouldn't be too disapointed by their recent election results. Yes, The Baddies won, but only over The Less-Baddies. Shit would not have been much different.
Quentin Tarantino is Shit. Admit it. He's Shit. He's only made one good film and that was a rip off. He's Shit. The sooner we all wake up to this fact, get shot of the fucker and carry on with our lives, the better.
The same exact thing goes for Martin Scorsese..except he hasn't made the one good film.
Iggy Pop selling insurance. How fucking sad is that?
What's next - Leonard Cohen slapping his own ass in an Asda advert?
The recent remake of unremakeable The Rise And Fall Of Reginald Perrin was actually quite funny.
Wacko Jacko was not a musical genius. Smokie did more great songs than he did.
Why does Mrs Zero always maoan 'Oh Christ' when I suggest watching 'Where Eagles Dare'?
I once came in Olivia Newton-John's face.
So - are zombies always going to be fast-moving now, or will they get re-re-imagined ?
Old 1970s & 1980s bands reforming is always crap except when Magazine do it.
30 Rock is fucking brilliant.
I am quite liking the whole Iron Man 2 Mickey Rourke as Whiplash thing. Even though Rourke's a proven tosser and superhero movies always fuck up the villains.

Monday, July 06, 2009

Watched The Spirit yesterday, as some light relief after the depressing four and a half hour Wimbledon final. What an absolute pile of shit, there's 125 minutes I'll never get back. Scarlett Johansson in Nazi gear did not help, which just goes to show how bad this film is.

Wednesday, July 01, 2009

Go Andy

Andy Roddick, that is. Not that Scottish chap.